DEMONS

He has demons and he is fighting them day by day

They might have claws that have held him so tight that all he can do is go along with it

He wakes up every day with demons talking to him and with him listening to them.

He will wake up ready to fight them one day and he believes that day will be the day of freedom.

 

My demons speak to me but how can I stop them from talking and me listening to them? I woke up this morning thinking I can stop them this time but I failed. It is bad to have demons in your mind but how do I stop them from manipulating you? They spoke and today I was able to say no to them. Not many people can say they overcame their demons but today of all days, I overcame my demons and I looked them in the face and said NO!! To my surprise, they could listen to my command and kept silent as I journey to live. Nothing moved me more than their silence in the dark. My darkroom door was shut tight and their voices were muted just because I had the power to speak to them. I now realize that they talk most of the time because they are afraid that I will overpower them with my voice. Little did I know that my voice carried the power to shut down the lifeless demons that had planned to stay in my mind forever. That morning, I felt the lifeless demons behind the red door not moving or saying anything. Such a victory will warrant some celebration but it was short-lived. The red door was opened and they came out storming every part of my mind and nothing became the same again. I was now a lifeless human being inhabited by lifeless creatures. The worse was about to happen and the damage would be grand.

 

The power to think was now in the lifeless creatures who had nothing but destruction in their mind. My thought pattern now was all about to go deep down the drain. I will not have the power to think as a normal person will but now, I have to follow every thought suggested to me by these creatures. When the battle is lost in the mind, the next thing is to concede defeat and plan another attack. After they won the race to be the main actors in my thought process, I became a slave to them and followed their every word. The man had been lost to these creatures and now they were the slave masters. The first thought that came to mind was their attack on my personality. I was worthless in this life. They began to belittle me and made me feel nothing in me could amount to anything. I was a man who had nothing in him to be who I wanted to be. The level of destruction had begun. They first attacked your potential and now I could feel them attacking me. My mind was now a desert with no water to help other things grow. They attacked me so much that I even feel my existence was a mistake. A mistake I felt I was even though my parents planned and gave birth to me. My whole mental faculty was in shambles and I could even feel the destruction in my heart. But their damage and destruction were just in my mind and not the heart. If they had managed to reach the heart, I believe I would have given up and this story would not have been possible.

My actions will not be different from my thought. The lifeless creatures won the battle to act in me what they wanted in the first place. I was just a robot acting on the wishes of those controlling my thoughts. I am not able to be myself and nothing felt like myself. I believe they won everything of my being and I could not hope for anything. These lifeless creatures were on me but they could not penetrate my heart. My actions towards those I love and the world before me were all examples of selfishness. I just thinking of taking more away from those who love me than what I was given them. The whole plan was to serve my slave masters because they had won my mind and there is no action without a thought. I am what I think of and Jesus said it in the Bible. I was gone but I still felt some hope lingering every time I spoke back at the demons. They could control my actions but they couldn’t keep it for a long time. They knew there will be a time I will win but they made sure they took more whenever they got the chance to rule and control. From the perspective of others, I was being myself but deep within I was struggling with these demons. I hope and prayed that someone will see the pain in my heart and mind but no one saw it, they saw me acting up and no one bothered to care for my mental state. Truth be told, I was down, both emotionally and mentally. To understand the action of others, it is better to see what is controlling their mindset and what thoughts they have. Now, to be free from these creatures, I have to start with my mind. Starting from the top to down, from my thoughts to my actions. I am almost losing the battle.

 

The flicker of hope came when I was about to separate that which was necessary to allow my mind to think about and that which was not important. It was good to know that my mind was a place of peace when I allow peace and love to dwell. This came as a surprise to me because, for all my life, I just knew every thought was mine and there was no outside influence apart from myself. If this thought to fornicate comes to mind, it means I wanted to fornicate and I worked with it not knowing my demons were the ones prompting those thoughts. I became so glued to the fact that no one had any control over my mind apart from the demons which so tormented me, I gave them the power without even contesting with them. I freely gave up not putting up a fight to take control of my mind. This is the sad realization of many men and women who have freely given up and said, this is who I am and this is who I believe I will be the rest of myself. I will not say suicide was not a part of my thoughts but it didn’t have that much power to stop my actions. When the thought has the power to influence your actions, you will be what and where the thought process ended. You are who you are when your thoughts have the power strong enough to influence your actions. The flicker of hope came when I saw that I have the power to counterattack the thoughts of these lifeless creatures. What will I do when these thoughts suggested by these lifeless creatures start rolling in my mind? I just need to look for something higher and greater than these lifeless beings. My mind is mine to keep under control and no one has the power to dictate it for me. That was the opening to shutting away my demons. I had another tool to fight against these lifeless creatures. What thoughts gave these creatures the power to control me? I opened the door for them to enter because I thought of things that gave them power.

 

The demons became my demons because I followed their suggestions and input. But when I did this counterattack with more thoughts that were not theirs, their power in my life became less. Freedom is not a word used for mental struggles but I gained freedom and independence from these lifeless creatures when I attacked them whenever they spoke to my mind. My mind is recovering but it is not there yet. Once I can capture the power to see the ability of my mind, no one can be able to suggest foolish thoughts and vain thoughts. I am who I am because I think and act according to suggestions.

 

His demons made their way out of his head and beneath his feet, they were kept in check,

They became afraid of the power he had now and they just became quiet,

The mistake was believing their suggestions and not believing who he was,

Congratulations to you who has overcome and is now independent,

The slave is now the slave master’s master.